Shinra: The Fanfic
by Reeve
Summary: Every single Shinra yaoi fanfic you've ever read, now in one convenient package! Well, not quite... Warnings: language, violence, and of course, yaoi.


In the middle of a barren, rocky valley stood a great construction project, the likes of which the Planet had never before seen. This was Midgar, the "Mako Metropolis" originally envisioned by the Shinra Electric Power Company, a private corporation that was, at this point in their history, beginning to hold very public interests. Thanks to their monopoly over the world's electricity, as well as their private army, Shinra was rapidly emerging as a dominant governmental force; only Wutai, whom they were currently warring against, dared to stand in their way. Midgar, which the company ruled over every aspect of, was home to their headquarters, as well as many of their most important officials.

"Goddammit!" Reeve swore as he marched back down the hall to his office. Another executive meeting had just ended and as usual, things hadn't gone right for Shinra's newly-appointed Chairman of Urban Development. The urgent matters he needed to discuss regarding the ongoing construction of Sector Seven had been swept aside in favor of discussion of the war and Sephiroth's most recent victory. He breezed past his secretary, a perky blonde named Elena who had previously worked as President Shinra and Heidegger's secretaries, grabbed the roll of blueprints that were waiting on her desk, and entered his domain, slamming the door behind him. He was halfway to his desk when he heard a blood curdling screech. Reeve jumped back, finding that he had accidentally stepped on his cat's tail. In turn, Cait Sith scurried to a dark corner of the room and nursed his bruised appendage, casting the occasional glare at his master.

No, nothing was going right.

Reeve sighed wearily, cleared his drafting table, and spread the blueprints across them. He had a lot to do before that evening's special event in the main lobby downstairs. After lighting himself a much-needed cigarette, he got down to work.

--------

Elsewhere in the Shinra Building, Reno stumbled out of a janitor's closet, buttoning his shirt, but only so much as he deemed necessary. A smug, satisfied grin spread across his face as his mako-tinted eyes glanced back at the dark space he had just left. Within the shadows stood a tall bald man named Rude, who was busy straightening his tie. His face was stoic, stuck in a permanent state that some might call zen, others introversion; meanwhile, his eyes were permanently hidden behind the impenetrably dark lenses of his sunglasses. He had even kept them on while he was with his comrade in the dark closet.

The saucy redheaded Reno licked his lips and purred, "Thanks for the brunch, man. I gotta go get ready for our trip to Junon. See ya in an hour, okay?"

Rude's cheeks just barely flushed pink as he stepped out of the closet, nodded, and walked off in the opposite direction.

---

Reno and Rude worked in the Shinra Manufacturing Department in Administrative Research. However, this impressively long name didn't actually mean much, so they were informally known as Turks. The Turks were covert agents who did the Shinra Corporation's dirty work-- kidnapping, spying, assassinations, and so on. Of course, since this type of work wasn't suited for just anyone, the Turks recruited their members from derelict slums, taking only the toughest, most streetwise thugs into their ranks. Reno had been a hustler and thief in Wall Market when Tseng, the Turks' leader, recruited him. Rude, on the other hand, was a former bouncer at an underground nightclub somewhere in the Sector Eight Slums. Both had led rough lives, rife with drugs, sex, and violence. And both men were, and are to this day, raging alcoholics.

---

Tseng, on the other hand, was somewhat unusual for a Turk. For starters, he was a native-born son of Wutai, the nation that the Shinra were currently waging war against. Secondly, his background was as mysterious as the origin of the small dot in the middle of his forehead, though he was just as cold and effortless in his work as his comrades. However, that's not to say he didn't differ from Reno and Rude in ways other than his origins. For starters, he knew better than to sneak quickies with coworkers in random closets during business hours. No, he much preferred a more proper approach: making love to his male companion at the latter's luxury penthouse. In fact, it was to this lover's large office that he was now heading. For not only was he a Turk, but he was also this man's bodyguard, a dual role which suited him well, for obvious reasons.

"Good morning, sir," Tseng greeted as he walked into the office. "I trust you're doing well?"

"I'm doing better now that you're here," replied a voice from behind the desk. The chair swiveled around to reveal a honey-haired young man with bright blue eyes; Rufus Shinra, the pampered young Vice-President of his father's corporation. "What's on today's agenda?"

"You weren't present at this morning's meeting?"

"I had other things to attend to."

Tseng nodded solemnly, thinking of Rufus' mother, who was deathly ill in the hospital. "I understand. So, I hear that Sephiroth is coming into town today."

"Yes. He's been on the front for a long time. We—that is to say, my father, the executives, and myself—are to meet him when he arrives at the Shinra Building early this evening."

Tseng rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "I don't suppose you'll want me to attend, will you?"

"Of course."

"Very well." Tseng leaned over the desk and, taking Rufus' chin in his hand, softly kissed his lips. "I'll see you then, Rufus."

The Vice-President sighed with pleasure as Tseng carefully brushed golden strands out of his face. "And afterward?"

"We'll see."

After another kiss, a touch more forceful this time, Tseng left the room.

--------

Sephiroth stepped off of the boat and onto Junon's dock, a full regiment of Shinra MPs saluting him as he disembarked. Following from behind was an admirer of his, a young SOLDIER First Class named Zack, whom he had become acquainted with during his last mission in Wutai. _Well _acquainted.

Zack, on the other hand, was keeping his eyes peeled for his friend Cloud, a Shinra MP stationed in Junon. They hadn't seen each other in quite awhile, and as wonderful as Sephiroth was, Zack sorely missed Cloud and wanted to see if he could come along with them to Midgar. The SOLDIER finally spotted his friend when the latter did his "special move" with his rifle. Zack nodded in his direction and came up beside Sephiroth.

"Sir, is it all right if I go visit a friend of mine?"

"As long as you are at the airport at the appointed time. Otherwise, I see no harm in it."

"Thank you, sir!" Zack replied, before giving the signal to Cloud.

---

About half an hour later, Cloud came up to Zack, who was waiting outside the entrance to the "Respectable Inn," and removed his helmet.

"Sorry I'm late," he panted.

"You didn't run all the way here, did you?"

"Well, I know you're headed to Midgar soon, and I wanna hear all about Wutai before you leave."

Zack smiled and winked. "Don't worry, I'll tell you as much as I can." He placed his arm across the diminutive Cloud's shoulders. "If we're lucky, maybe I can talk Sephiroth into letting you come along. C'mon. Let's hit the bar and catch up on things."

The boyish MP's cheeks flushed pink against his pale ivory skin. "O-okay."

Together, they headed toward the nearest pub. When they entered the place, Zack could see that it was empty, save for the bartender and two men in dark suits-- one with flaming red hair, and the other bald-- sitting at the bar with their backs to the door. _The Turks_, Zack thought. Sensing that this might be trouble, he started backing away, but then the redhead turned around.

"Heyyyyyy," he slurred. "Rude, checkit out! SOLDIER boy and his lil' ivory-skinned MP've come to get wasted!"

The bald one, Rude, said nothing.

"C'mon over here, SOLDIER boy," the redhead continued, patting his thigh. "Come sit on ol' Reno's lap and tell me why none of you pansy-ass First Classes can get yourself any _real_ men!"

"I've got it realer than you can ever imagine," Zack shot back. Cloud inquisitively looked up into his friend's eyes, causing Zack to almost regret his words.

"Izzat so?" Reno drawled. "What, Gen'ral Sephiroth fuckin' you or somethin'?"

Zack backed away slightly, suddenly feeling very uncomfortable.

"Goddamn Sephiroth. Sometimes I think he sees more action than me, and I don't mean killin' ninja."

This statement caused Rude to sharply turn his head to Reno.

"Geez, don't give me _that_ look, big guy."

Now that Reno was distracted, Zack took the opportunity to completely back away from the door and take off into the streets, dragging Cloud along with him.

Back in the bar, Reno returned his attention to the door, scowling once he saw that the two newcomers had left. He swiveled around on his stool and raised his arm. "Bartender! One more for the road!"

--------

Stealthily, a dark shadow sneaked through the dimly-lit corridors of Junon's barracks, pausing every few seconds and listening. He was disgusted by much of what he heard, but continued on nonetheless. His mission relied on thorough knowledge of the situation, and for that reason, he had to listen.

He came upon his latest door and carefully pressed his ear against it. From within, he heard the following conversation taking place:

"So then, Sephiroth said that we couldn't head that way, because the ninja'd ambush us there."

"Uhhhhh."

"We had a couple of other choices, so he had scouts sent out."

"Mmmmmm."

"I volunteered to go—oh—oh yeah..."

Just then, the sound of boots came from down the hall. The shadow slithered back and watched as the silver-haired demon Sephiroth came into view, stopping right before the same room he had just been eavesdropping on. Sephiroth knocked just as a loud, extended moan came from that room. There was a pause, then the door opened, and a young man with spiky black hair poked his head through.

"Oh! Sir, what brings you here?"

Sephiroth smiled, causing the watching shadow to bristle slightly. "I just came to see how my... charge was doing."

"Umm... well, I'm kind of in the middle of something."

"I can see that. May I come... in?"

"If you insist, sir."

"That I do."

The young man's head disappeared and the door opened wider. Sephiroth stepped inside, the door closing behind him. The shadow shook his head before continuing on his way.

He rounded the corner and crept up a flight of stairs to a restricted area that contained suites for officers, executive officials, and Turks. Staying out of the light, he paused and listened, finding most of these rooms fairly quiet. Then, the door to the stairwell he had come up suddenly swung open, and two men in dark suits stumbled into the hallway, both of them reeking of alcohol. Before darting behind a large metal pipe, the shadow could make out their features. The taller one was bald, muscular, and wore sunglasses, while the shorter one was lanky and bore a shock of messy red hair which was accessorized by a pair of strange goggles. In addition, this shorter one was dragging the taller by his necktie, and both were staggering; the smell that clung to them grew ever stronger as they neared the shadow's hiding spot.

Fortunately, they stopped in front of a door just a couple of yards away from the pipe. The short one fumbled with his keys for a moment, finally selected one, then made a few attempts to find the keyhole. Once he shoved it in, he turned it, then the doorknob, and both men stumbled into the room. The door slammed shut behind them.

The shadow waited a few minutes before emerging into the hallway again. He sneaked up to the suite the two suited men had entered, and paused, listening once more. And once more he heard the sounds of decadent pursuits. Gasps. Moans. The rhythmic squeaking of floorboards.

He smiled. All these months of endless waiting and research were finally coming to a head, and the Shinra were as clueless as ever. _These lustful, bourgeoisie idiots_, the shadow thought, _will never know what hit them._

--------

Back at the Shinra Building, Rufus decided to drop by Reeve's office, partially to remind him about Sephiroth's expected arrival, partially to see how Midgar's ongoing construction was progressing, and partially for his own, personal, reasons.

"Mr. Vice-President," Elena said as Rufus walked into Reeve's reception area. "What brings you here?"

"I just came to see Reeve, discuss some business, the usual."

Rufus could tell that Elena wasn't buying it, but she didn't let it show. "Well," the secretary said, "my boss doesn't wish to be disturbed at the moment. He's got a lot of work to do."

"Isn't that always the case?" Rufus smiled, his amber hair dully glistening in the fluorescent light.

"Yes, but..."

"Listen, I won't be long. Now be a good girl and tell your boss that one of _his_ bosses is here."

Elena fidgeted, then finally got up from her chair and walked to Reeve's door. However, instead of going inside, she turned to face Rufus, creating a barrier between him and Reeve's office.

"I know what you're up to, Mr. Vice-President, and there's one thing I need to ask."

"Which is?"

"W-what about Tseng's feelings? Don't you care about him?"

Rufus stared at Elena with incredulity. "What business is that of yours?"

She lowered her head as the blood rushed to her cheeks. "I... I don't want to see him hurt."

"You don't know a damned thing about our relationship, do you," he sniffed, before trying to push Elena out of the way.

"It-- it's not an _open_ one, is it?"

Rufus said nothing. From within the office, Reeve's voice called, "Elena? Is there something going on out there?"

"Better let me through," the Vice-President said to Elena, with more than a hint of authority in his tone, "and that's an order."

"Y-yes sir."

Elena stepped aside to allow Rufus to enter Reeve's office.

---

"Make it quick, Mr. Vice-President," were Reeve's first words once the towheaded Rufus entered the room. "I have a lot to get done today before Sephiroth's arrival."

"That's actually what I came to remind you of. That, and I wanted to see how the work on Sector Seven was coming."

Reeve, who hadn't looked up from his blueprints ever since Rufus' entrance, replied, "Just fine. There's a few technical issues here and there, but it's nothing I can't handle."

Rufus casually sauntered up to Reeve's desk and leaned against it. "Glad to hear it." At that moment, an odd, yet strong scent caught his attention. It wasn't the ever-present smell of cigarette smoke, but something else. He sniffed the air, an action which caused Reeve to raise his head and stare at the fair-haired Vice-President.

"Perfume," Rufus concluded. He turned to face Reeve, who immediately averted his eyes. "Scarlet?"

The Urban Dev. Chair said nothing.

"She make the first move?"

Reeve nervously fumbled with his cigarette as he tried to flick the charred end into the ashtray. "Yes, sir."

"As usual."

"Huh?"

Rufus laughed. "You really are new to the upper echelons of the Company, aren't you? That's just how this place operates."

"What do you mean, sir?"

"What do you _think_ I mean?" Rufus replied, pulling out a clove cigarette and lighting it, his flaxen mane drooping down in front of his face. Reeve raised an eyebrow.

"Cloves, sir?"

"You have a problem with cloves, Reeve? Come on, speak your mind."

"I just think they're a bit pretentious."

Rufus took a couple puffs, then held the cigarette idly between his index and middle fingers. "Ever had one?"

"No sir."

"Would you like a taste?"

Reeve shrugged, and started moving his hand forward, as if expecting Rufus to just hand it over. However, this was not what the Vice-President had in mind. Instead, he leaned across the desk so that his face was only inches away from Reeve's.

"I never said I was going to lend you my cigarette," Rufus said in a low voice.

Reeve froze, a soft "Oh..." escaping his lips.

As Rufus slowly moved closer to his target, a phone began ringing. Both men paused. It was Reeve's PHS.

"I should get that. Hold on."

Rufus slid off the top of Reeve's desk and idly replied, "No, no. There'll be other times. I should get going. See you this evening?"

Reeve gave the Vice-President a wary sidelong glance before answering, "...Yeah, this evening. The front lobby, right?"

"Right."

As Reeve turned to the business of answering his phone, Rufus left the office, whistling innocently as he passed Elena's desk.

--------

The appointed hour had come, and all of the company executives gathered in the front lobby of the Shinra Building, along with a regiment of MPs and various lookers-on. Tseng, who had surprised Rufus by arriving at his office to escort him downstairs, left the elevator with the young Vice-President, and took in the scene. President Shinra stood in the center of the room by the large glass sign, a thick cigar wedged between his equally thick fingers. Scarlet and Heidegger were present at his sides, and the other execs-- Hojo, Palmer, and Reeve-- weren't too far from him either. Standing near Reeve was his secretary, a young woman who, Tseng knew, was hoping to become a Turk. She caught Tseng staring at her, and quickly averted her eyes, her cheeks turning a bright shade of pink. Tseng sighed wearily and turned back to Rufus, who was busily examining his reflection in the shiny surface of the glass elevator tube.

"Let's join the others, sir. General Sephiroth will be arriving at any moment."

Brushing his long strawberry-blond bangs out of his eyes, Rufus replied, "Very well."

Tseng and Rufus walked over to the group, greeting them with nods. After a few minutes of waiting, a couple of SOLDIER members came through the front doors of the building. Behind them was Sephiroth, who was leading a small escort that consisted of Reno and Rude, both reeking of alcohol, as well as a spiky-haired SOLDIER First Class and a rather short Shinra MP.

President Shinra came forward to greet his top officer with one arm extended. "Greetings, General. It's not every day that you come to visit us from the front."

Sephiroth took the President's hand and shook it firmly. "The pleasure's mine, Mr. President."

"Mwa ha ha, of course it is, my boy! Now, shall we head upstairs and—"

President Shinra's words were suddenly interrupted by a loud _bang_. Sephiroth fell back, blood flying from his forehead. Aghast, the President backed away.

Rufus started exclaiming, "What the hell's going on?" but was interrupted mid-sentence by a lean, muscular arm wrapped around his throat. As he struggled to breathe, he felt the cold end of a pistol's barrel press up to his temple, and a familiar voice say, "Stay calm, sir. Just stay calm and I won't kill you... for the time being."

Alarmed, Rufus whispered, "T-Tseng?"

Tseng smiled as the Shinra MPs present encircled the executives and the fallen General's escort, their materia-equipped weapons drawn. These MPs were really ninja from Tseng's home nation of Wutai, who he had managed to get jobs for at the Shinra Building. The sniper who had shot Sephiroth was another one of these ninja, a highly-trained assassin who had become rather adept with firearms since being accepted into the Shinra military. Now these men, _his_ men, had the greatest leaders of the Eastern Continent surrounded, in a moment which made these past couple of years' within the ranks of the Turks well worth it. Tseng laughed triumphantly as Rufus bristled in his grip, the latter's auriferous locks having somehow lost their shine.

"You Shinra have fought long and hard against us," Tseng declared, "but you underestimate the power of Lord Godo's forces. Long have you, the inner circle, mused upon this tiny black mark on my forehead. Before you die, I will reveal its secret to you. It is the mark given to Wutai's top-ranking officer, second only to Lord Godo himself!"

The Shinra executives began murmuring amongst themselves, comparing their own previously pondered theories about Tseng's dot against each other. Irritated by all of this, the Turk-cum-spy boomed, "_Silence!_"

By now, Rufus' face was bright red, though unlike previous times, it was neither from embarrassment nor some deeply buried bashfulness. "Why T-Tseng...?" he gasped. " Why do you hate us... so much?"

Tseng gritted his teeth; he had become Rufus' lover to better blend in with his enemies, and as a result, hated him most of all. "Isn't it obvious, you vain little prick? The culture you have allowed to fester here, at this corporation-- it's absolutely decadent."

"What's so decadent about it?" Scarlet asked, disgustedly eyeing one of the MPs who had their machine guns pointed at her.

"You of all people should know the answer to that!" Tseng snapped back. "Everyone here has slept with everyone else-- well, at least those of you who could claim to be at least halfway attractive. You have all cheated on each other, lusted after one another, and been mentally torn asunder by any contrary thoughts you might've had only to, in the end, give in to your basest instincts. In the process, you all have become predictable caricatures of yourselves."

The prisoners-- especially the attractive ones that Tseng had singled out-- shared silent, uneasy glances with each other.

"You Shinra are vile, repulsive, sex-obsessed creatures," Tseng continued, "and I'm proud to be the one who will correct your wretched ways."

A sinister laugh rang through the room, catching Tseng off guard; "Over my dead body." A flash of silver followed, and three of the ninja MPs fell, blood streaming from their backs. Tseng and his captives all looked in the direction of the voice and saw that it was Sephiroth; despite the large bullet hole in his head, he looked as healthy as ever. Tseng's visage paled slightly, but otherwise, he did not flinch.

"I don't die very easily, I'll have you know," said the General, drawing his Masamune sword into a defensive position.

By way of a reply, Tseng took Rufus' head in his gun hand and twisted sharply. A loud crack was heard, causing the prisoners to wince. Tseng let go of Rufus, allowing his now-dead body to collapse to the floor. The surrounding MPs cocked their triggers, more focused on their hostages than ever, while Tseng calmly folded his arms across his chest and returned Sephiroth's gaze.

"Don't try and play hero, General. Especially since you're as guilty of perversion as the rest of your lot."

Now it was Sephiroth's turn to be shocked. Tseng had now revealed himself to be the most ruthless type of killer-- even moreso than the loyal Turk they all had believed him to be. Under Tseng's gaze, the General remained still for a long time, as if lost in thought, before laying down his sword before his captor.

--------

_Epilogue:_

The Wutai War came to an end not long after Tseng's ambush of the Shinra Electric Power Company's bigwigs. Tseng went home to a hero's welcome, and as a reward, Lord Godo arranged for his betrothal to the princess Yuffie. Now the undisputed ruler of much of the world, Godo lived for twenty more years as the Planet's most respected-- and feared-- ruler. Upon his death, Tseng took the throne, with his wife, the Lady Yuffie, at his side.

---

Sephiroth never fully recovered from either his bullet wound or his defeat at the Shinra Building. For various war crimes, he was exiled by the Great Continent's new rulers to Cactuar Island. He had only one visitor in all that time-- a virginal raven-haired girl of mysterious origins, who bore the name Seraphim Arianne. She wore black clothes, was an agile fighter, and had the most peculiar amethyst eyes. Eventually, Sephiroth found her flawless beauty, tragic past, and frequent attempts to make him whipped rather irritating, so he killed her.

---

Zack and Cloud, prevented from following their leader into exile, took up residence together in Midgar as freelance mercenaries. However, their world was shattered when one night, when Cloud's childhood friend Tifa and Zack's one-time fling Aeris unexpectedly came back into their lives and later burst in on them at an inconvenient moment. Lots of drama and angst ensued, which continued for years to come.

---

Shortly after the end of the war, Reno and Rude walked into a bar, and have not been seen since.

---

Thoroughly bored by the peace that followed Shinra's defeat, Reeve left Midgar with his pet cat and went to work for the Wutai government. However, much to his dismay, he found the work to be unchallenging and largely stress-free. He resigned and left for Rocket Town, where he found a kindred spirit in Cid Highwind. Together, they wallowed in self-pity, argued with anyone who dared cross them, and eventually died of lung cancer.

---

Reeve's secretary Elena followed her former boss to Wutai, partially so she could observe Tseng. She remained in Wutai for a number of years, and made various attempts to get Tseng's attention, eventually touching off a lifelong rivalry with Yuffie.

For creating various superweapons used against the nation of Wutai during the war, Scarlet was sentenced to work in the kitchen of the Turtle's Paradise restaurant. Although this might not seem like harsh punishment, for Scarlet it was pure torture; she developed calluses on her previously perfect fingers as well as bags under her eyes, got grease and sauce stains all over her red satin dress, and put on twenty pounds from eating leftover soba.

---

President Shinra, Palmer, and Heidegger all led fascinating lives after the war ended, but as none of them are attractive enough to merit further mention, none shall be made. Hojo, on the other hand, led an unusually boring life, as the defeat of Shinra left him without funding for his mad experiments. He was last seen in Nibelheim with a tall man in a red cloak; as for what they were doing there, it isn't suitable for printing.

---

Rufus Shinra was buried in a cemetery a few miles outside of Midgar, where he remains to this day.

_(Originally written in May 2005.)_


End file.
